Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again.
- Og Mandino
Before you set out to do any of these and dismiss them with ineffective results, remember that influence is not an overnight process. Chronic bad habits do not have quick fixes. This is a comprehensive list, pick one and be consistent with your efforts. Save this article and revisit it when you need to.
1.Listen
Listen to people attentively. Look at them and avoid all distractions. Your gaze should make them feel that they have all your attention and you are listening.
2.Try and Solve People's Problem
3.Do Exemplary Work
If you show your boss sloppy work, he will assume you show everyone sloppy work.
4.Always Present Ideas to People as Suggestions
If you are too excited when presenting a new idea to your team, people's natural defenses activate. Instead simply make a suggestion and keep your passionate energy as you will need it to drive persistent effort.
5.Give Genuine Compliments
Smile at someone. Give them a silent compliment. Wish strangers well. Greet people with a smile. Become genuinely interested in other people.
6.Speak Clearly and Slowly
If you appear you are in rush then people will always tend to treat you like that. Slow down, think through your thoughts and speak with clarity.
7.Make the Other Person Feel Important
Do it Sincerely. Remember People’s Name. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
8.Offer Your Help
Help others achieve their goals. Make them believe that you are there to help them
9.Don't Criticize, Condemn or Complain
This is one of the hardest thing to do. But the simple rule is do not talk negative about your team, project, boss, co-worker etc.
10.Say ‘Please’ and ‘Thank You’
11.Be Humble
Arrogance will always come back to bite you.
12.Treat People with Respect
13.Be Assertive
Stand up for a good idea. If you believe something should be done as it will benefit the greater good then do not hesitate to step up. Remember there is a fine line between rude and assertive, be careful.
14.Be a Diplomat
Figure out how to achieve your objectives through diplomacy, not open or covert warfare.
15.Maintain Eye Contact When Speaking
16.Appeal to the Nobler Motives
People tend to favor hope, optimism, greater good over self-focused opportunist activities.
17.Don't Interrupt People While They Speak
18.Show Respect for the Other Person's Opinions
Never say, "You're wrong.". Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
19.If You are Wrong, Admit it Quickly
20.Always Smile and Lean In Closer when Listening
Do not appear weird. Be natural. Smiling during an intense discussion relaxes the person who is talking to you. It should be a friendly smile, conveying to them that you are listening and understanding what they are saying.
21.Try to See Things from Other Person's View
22.Smile when Your Eyes Meet Someone
I am not talking about the awkward closed lip smile, which gives the perception that I acknowledge you but I don’t want to talk to you.
23.Encourage People to Challenge Your Ideas
24.Under Promise Over Deliver
This is well known in consulting circles. Rule is simple, don't get overly excited and try to impress by boasting about things you cannot deliver. Keep your word no matter how small and you will be respected.
25.Make a Firm Handshake
26.Don’t Scratch Yourself while Talking/Listening
This includes Ear, Nose, Arm-Pits, Thighs etc. If you have an irresistible itch then excuse yourself and go do your thing in private.
27.Dress For The Part
28.Encourage Others to Talk About Themselves
Talk in terms of the other people's interests. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
29.Talk about Your Mistakes Before Criticizing Other
30.No Arguments
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
31.Start Conversations in a Friendly Way
32.Let the Other Person Feel That The Idea is His/Hers
Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
33.Dramatize Your Ideas
34.Praise Improvement
Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise." Use encouragement. Make the person’s fault seem easy to correct.
35.If You Think Everything is Going Well, You're Out of Touch
36.Focus on the Purpose of the Meeting
Don't dwell on things that are not on the critical path to ending the meeting.
37.Ask Questions Instead of Giving Direct Orders
38.Get to Know People
Go on lunches with them. Find out what they like? Their passions and interests. Send them a website if you think they might like to read it.
39.Enjoy Working with People
40.Completely Understand the Question Before You Answer
Do not be overwhelmed by this list. Let it serve as a guide to help you. Pick one way which appeals to you and master it, instead of trying to do them all at once.
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